Auschwitz

**I wrote this yesterday, added a little today before I posted.  I will post the rest of krakow/berlin this week. While this experience was sad, krakow is an amazing city and this trip allowed me to meet many people on CEA that I didn't know yet, and really brought us together in place I would have never visited had it not been for this trip. 

Today we went to Auschwitz.  Now having the experience I did in Berlin last weekend, I had many Holocaust stories fresh in my mind.  On the way there, people were making comments like, “I hope they have water there,” “I’m so hungry,” “I hope its not too cold.” I couldn’t help but think about the people being being forced to Auschwitz years ago, and how they probably had the same wishes. 

You walk through the gates,  “Work will set you free,”  the infamous picture im sure you have all seen, and into the camp. The beginning was very similar to many other museums, and gave a history.  People were taking pictures, myself included, and it was not as sad as I thought it would be, and many things I have seen and heard before. 

Then we heard about the gassings.  That Jews were told they were getting a bath and to, ”remember where they put their stuff”. It only took 29 min to kill 800 people.  Then Jews would go to move the bodies. To strip them of gold.  To shave their heads. I don’t think I knew it was the prisoners who dealt with the bodies.  I don’t know how they could do that.   

models of the gassings, you cannot see the showers 

 so crowded 

the poison used 

empty bottles found 

(people were allowed one 25 kilo suitcase for the rest of their life... and to think i had trouble packing in 2 50 lb suitcases for 4 months abroad)

The worst part was the next room. 2 tons of human hair, behind a wall of glass.  Mountains of hair, all different colors, some still in its braids.  This hair was shaved off the heads of women killed in the gas chambers.  All hair had traces of cyanide in it. The hair was sold to the textile industry. To make socks, sweaters, and Nazi uniforms.  This is one of the most in humane things I have ever heard.  In that room were also baby clothes.  We learned that no kids survived unless they had blonde hair blue eyes and a certain face shape.  If I was living in the 1940’s I would have been gassed. This room was the most emotional.  The next rooms had shoes(similar to DC but more) but I couldn’t even look.  The hair was what killed me. How many people make 2 tons of hair? I can’t wrap my mind around it.  I can’t stop thinking about it.   These were essentially corpses, all that was left from the bodies that were burned.  This hair, from who knows how many women is on display for the world.  These ladies will not have a proper burial, they are all clumped and mixed together.  I feel awfully, yet they are doing the one of the most important things, by showing people how awful this was.  In this room it felt real. Everyone left silently, teary eyed, and in disbelief. 

It began to snow and I didn’t even feel it. I wanted to wait in the cold, because I will never feel what these people did. It was the least I could do.  I have never seen such sad things.  After the hair I didn’t take a single picture.  I knew these were images I will never forget, and things I would never see again. 

If you would like to hear about what I saw I would be happy to tell you, but I think this is something everyone should see on their own, if they have the chance.  I will never understand what these people went through.  I can only imagine.  When you leave aushowitz there is a gift shop and food.  Although I was hungry, I didn’t allow myself to eat.  It didn’t feel right when starvation was one of the weapons Hitler used to break the psyche of the Jews.  I honestly was shocked they had a snack bar there, it really didn't seem right. 

We continued to birkenau, but it was a very short tour and not as emotional.  It is hard to imagine the camps PACKED with people as I know they once were.

Honestly I have never understood how people could deny the Halocost happened but after today I see it(in no sense do I mean I don’t believe it happened, just that this experience was so surreal). These camps were huge.  Everything was so well calculated, and no one could do anything to stop it.  The documentation of the events is insane.  I couldn’t believe my eyes, the amount of people involve… HOW could ANYONE and EVERYONE let this happen.  I can’t wrap my head around how this happened, I don’t even think I understand the numbers behind that happened.  This event has never seemed to surreal to me than today. 

the only pics I took here, I didn't really feel like taking pictures, its eerie and weird

I wish I could promise I will never complain about being hungry, tired, cold, scared, uncertain,  or lonely again.  However, I know that isn’t possible.  I caught myself today(Sunday) saying I was starving and quickly stopped.  I thankfully do not know the meaning of that word.  I will never know.  This experience puts perspective on simple things we take for granted in life.  I don’t know true physical exhaustion(FH preseason doesn’t come close) It also put my abroad trip in perspective.  Life is short, and I am so blessed to have the opportunity that I have.  I need to take advantage of everything I can, and be completely open to not only new things but new people as well. What if Hitler got to know a Jew? Really know a Jew, who he really liked? Would this have all been prevented? I am definitely going to work on not judging people. Today(sun) in the salt mines everyone was complaining of exhaustion.  I was tired and claustrophobic a mile underground but I just thought of the people in the camps and kept going.  I know with my willpower I can do anything, and I feel, now more than ever, as if I need to represent the Jewish race as best I can. 

Everyone reacted differently to what they saw, but for me what I took out of it is I have it great.  I am so thankful for the people and things in my life.  I am going to work on being thankful but also not to sweat the small stuff.  I see how precious life is and I am on the trip of a lifetime. I will not waste a minute. 

But most important, I want to urge everyone to go see this. It something i believe everyone, not just Jews should experience. That way people will never forget (trust me I wont forget a single detail from yesterday).  I hope that something like this NEVER happens again. 

On that note, thank you everyone who is reading this for being a part of my life, and supporting this trip, and all that I do.